Yes, even Tam's tire of the treadmill - the steady drone of an existence in fastforward whilst the mental gears grind in reverse. I find I must hammer the gears - add some nitrous and forceably take over the machine again.
I wonder about some of you. Others - I long to connect with as I did just a few months ago. Still others - I'm learning to love. But there are a few of you....I just want to ask you why are you here? Somewhere in the dust and dendrites the banshee rattles her chains and growls - "You shouldn't have to ask....you should know." The banshee never lies. That's why I hate her.
I wonder why the generic invite you sent me was your only point of contact? I wonder why when I vehemently stand against genitalia shots - you set to amass a collection of fools (myself amongst the rabble) only to unveil a random crotch in closeup technicolor. I wonder why when I have never and will never download yahoo IM - you ask me to chat? Perhaps it is your modus operandi to pee in the wheaties of the gullible daily. Mea culpa - the scent should register.
I have some friends here. I have connections. I seek contact. I desire mentors. Are these statements clear enough for you who do not know me? If you aren't already a friend and you think the lion is cute - thank you. But friendships are never formed on the basis of cutesy pics pilfered from the internet. I am a real girl with a real soul and a real spirit. I'm way past sixteen and happily married. The time I have to invest in blessing the lives of others is limited - so please, read me before sending that invite....do us both that favor.
Some of you have never commented on my page. I wonder if I am truly just a collectors shot. I wonder why you keep me? What purpose do I serve? An unread writer....some of you have been with me almost a year and you have never commented. *sighs* For those of you who are newer...its okay. There's time. But for others....I wonder....
It's time for me to reconnect with the dear friends I have here on 360. You are precious to me and you know who you are. Some of you - I used to visit every day. I want that connection back, so I'm goin' for it. (I'm coming to visit - put the tea on) Some of you are newer - and have made an investment of time in me. I thank you for it. I will be returning the favor. And some of you....I suppose I will continue to wonder for the rest of my life. Maybe you will comment. Maybe you won't - but you are more than a headshot....I value your words. So I will be visiting.
for those of you not already on my friends list - if you want to connect - read me first. Comment on a blog or two. Then send a real invite - not a generic one. Its a public blog...you don't have to be on the 'list' to comment, capiche? and if you say something funny, thought provoking, interesting or just plain nice, I'll return the favor. Really.
As always. If I've missed you lately - hit me with an email. This will be the last Tuesday post for awhile. I will also not post on Wednesdays (But I will be bloggin my butt off now on the weekend) I have a job, a worship service, and a class I teach. I don't have time to visit my dear friends here on those days so why blog on those days as well.)
To keep it real....I discovered this week I was placed in favorites hell by a woman I dearly care about. I assume it was because I either offended her by my words....or by the lack of my presence on her page. I simply cannot take you for granted - if I desire your presence. Its give and take, not take and take.
Peace. I'm switching to night time blogging so that I have more time to visit and also - the fat is not going away whilst my butt is in the PC chair...so I must start some type of 'exercise plan' (oh the horror...) and I know if I don't do it immediately in the am - I won't do it at all.
Catch me on thursday evening - I will be my better self. Yes, the weirdo will be back in the drivers seat, but I needed to be real with you...just for today.
